Chirp Chirp: Can someone please explain twitter to me?

To paraphrase Oscar Wilde, conformity is the last refuge of the unimaginative. But alas, I have become unimaginative and succumbed to social pressure. I just joined the 21st century and got myself a twitter account. #exciting!

Yes, I know I am possibly the last 20-something-social-media-entusiast in the world to get one.
Yes, I know I don’t need yet another social media outlet to procrastinate through.
No, it’s not going to stop me using twitter to procrastinate.
Yes, I know that I am very late to the party.
No, I have no idea what I am doing or how to use twitter.
Yes, the main reason I got twitter was in anticipation of 2013 #Qanda starting
And yes, the twitter narcism has already hit me.

To be honest, I feel like twitter is just going to cause me anxiety. Simply setting the account up took me an hour. Firstly, I couldn’t decide on a twitter name (my name is mildly impossible to spell and even harder to pronounce). Secondly, after initially picking 10 people I wanted to follow, I looked back on my choices of politicians, activists and news broadcasters and realised I am boring and people will judge me. Thus I reworked my list and added a comedian to it to make me look more interesting. Can you smell the narcism and need to be liked?

Anxiety

Lastly, twitter is going to give me anxiety because I don’t know how to use it. I have enough trouble expressing myself through a blog where I can ramble on for hours to make my point. How am I going to make witty remarks about my pet peeves and Ryan Gosling the world in less than 140 characters? #itsimpossible #Iliketoramble

I know that I live in a world where todays 20-somethings live by the philosophies of ‘didn’t twitter it, didn’t happen’ and ‘history is made through facebook photos’ but I just don’t think my life is that interesting to warrant people reading 140 character long updates on it.

I’m fairly sure you don’t want to know that I just had a gluten-free strawberry gelato, that I have a hangover from too much wine and that I’m pretty sure gluten-free strawberry gelato doesn’t actually do anything to cure a hangover. I’m also pretty sure you don’t want to know my opinions on various TV as they’re happening or how my weekly laundry is going. But I know I need to stay with the times and update the world about my mundane activities on at least 4 different social media platforms. Hey, I don’t make the rules…I just follow them.

Assuming I actually learn how to use twitter it could be fun and entertaining. But I will make a vow to never tweet about salads or sunshine. I’m better than that.
Besides, salads and sunshine deserve whole blog posts and not just 140 character jokes.

And to get into the spirit of it:
#pleasefollowme    #letsbetwitterfriends 
#areyouallowedpunctuationinhashtags?        
#hashtag

You can find my twitter page @tgvozdic9

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7 thoughts on “Chirp Chirp: Can someone please explain twitter to me?

  1. this is hilarious! and I felt almost the same when I first joined twitter a few months ago! but, trust me, it grows on you. I prefer it over Facebook, mainly because on twitter you find more useful and interesting information 🙂 Hope you enjoy it and get settled in quick!

  2. I’ve had a twitter account for some time, after reading this post I went and logged on to it as I never really do, there are 458 tweets from me, I am following 8 and am followed by 7 (Two of whom are friends, one is a pub and Ive no idea who the others are or what they tweet about because I hardly ever read it.).

    So like you I am not really sure how to use it! my current opinion and one that I’ve always held is that it is a broken pencil (pointless) and a place for people with something to sell to push something down your neck and spam you with 140 characters (including spaces) multiple times per day.

    But hey that’s just my opinion 🙂 I would love to find a use for it but am struggling to think of one.

    • I’ve got to say I’m inclined to agree with you. So far, I’m enjoying twitter as I’m following some interesting people so it’s an easy way to see what they’re all saying in one place. But I don’t really have much to ‘tweet’ about or anyone to tweet it to. I think it’s something that takes time build up and become fun.
      Thank you for your comment. I had a look round your blog, it’s a shame you’ve stopped writing. Hopefully you’ll find the inspiration to start again soon. =)

      • Hi there. I think that was an issue I had with it too in that I didn’t have anything to say myself, I started by following a bunch of celebrities but then removed them although I cannot recall the exact reasons why?

        You maybe right about the taking time to make make it fun, for me though I’ve not the patience for that, and I don’t find the content satisfying, not like a blog where people actually write stuff.

        re my blog, I was having a particularly bad woe is me day yesterday and reversed my decision to quit it.

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